Communication problems occur in many areas of everyday life today, but especially in partnerships. It does not matter how long the relationship has been going on, because communication problems do not always have to do with a lack of attention to others. Sometimes one is distracted when the other asks for something.
Tips for better communication with the partner
Then the answer to the question, "Please bring the garbage down" can also be: "Yes, that was a business again"! Here, however, a certain degree of blindness also plays a role; in the course of many years of relationship, you no longer concentrate on the other as at the beginning. If for some reason the respect is no longer as it was at the beginning, urgent action should be taken.
What can couples do about it?
There is hardly a magic formula for getting used to each other. Over the years you get used to each other and that's good as long as it doesn't dull. If there is a lack of respect for the other, work must first be done on why this is so.
Some things are taken for granted in the partnership. In the past, roles in the home and in marriage were determined by different structures. The man earned the money and the woman looked after the household and child. Almost no one complained, only later, after emancipation began to emerge, were there women who rebelled and men who protested.
The more women sought equality, the more differences there could be. Could, but didn't necessarily have to. Now it was not a question of persuading your own husband, but of convincing you of your career, the existing or nonexistent desire to have children and many other things.
If everything is tacitly accepted, there will either be a bang at some point or you will simply no longer accept the other. And here is probably part of the reason that you can no longer listen.
Respect and communication
You can learn to listen to others, we have to listen to the boss and we can do that too. You show him respect and respect, why not the partner too? For good communication and willingness to listen, there are a few important points to keep in mind:
- Show respect
- show interest
- take time
- Can listen
A good conversation needs a listener, and one who is on the job. You can quickly shout something in the partnership, you don't have to turn off the TV or put the book away. However, when it comes to reporting on the day, work, hours with the children or your own problems, the partner should be fully attentive. It is a sign of respect, everything else would be half-hearted.
Listen properly and think along
Listening properly means listening actively. Let the partner finish and not come up with their own solution proposals and certainly not with trivialization. If the other wants to know what you think of it, he will put it. Then you can come up with your own solutions, advice, or comfort. It is equally important not to assume that the other person is talking to something that you think you hear between the words. It is definitely not the right time to do this. Even those who are asked for advice should not hear whether they really mean it, because that implies that they are practically dishonest. You can learn from every mistake and hopefully that means doing it better next time.
Such conversations can be learned, a specialist can also be brought to the side. Anyone who realizes that sensible communication is no longer possible without help should not shy away from it. It does not matter whether this is a parent consultation or a couple consultation. Any relationship should be worth talking to again.